Aside from the obvious tragedies that life can bring, the one thing I so wish I could protect my sweet girl from is...mean girls.
I think we can all agree that girls can be really mean. It starts at a young age. The little girls in our subdivision are always shouting, "I'm telling on you!" for some reason or other. They push each other around and they're so demeaning. I've even found myself in the presence of toddler girls who are kind of snotty. A two year old in the church nursery gave my sweet girl a dirty look a few weeks ago and I was floored!
As women, we must work hard to keep a tight grip on our thoughts, for our thoughts effect our facial expressions and thusly, our words and actions. I know that I can't protect her from the heartache of mean girls; I guess it's just a fact of life. But what I can do is work to keep her from becoming a mean girl.
My earliest memory of a mean girl was in elementary school. There was a girl who I think was in special ed that I would try to be nice to but she would slap me at recess. Additionally, we lived in a large neighborhood with lots of kids and lots of opportunities for hurt feelings. Little girls are full of drama, and I remember being right in the middle of it. I was always yelling in defense of someone else but wasn't necessarily the object of meanness.
In middle school, we had moved to a new state and there were these two girls who were very popular. Everyone worshipped them because girls with fake tans who smoked behind the gym were apparently fantastic. My first week at this new school, all of my books fell out of my locker onto my head, and they never let me live it down. They tormented me and called me "big ugly". I was neither ugly or big, but I maintain the fact that my low self-esteem came directly from the first week of the second semester of 8th grade. Those girls were mean.
Things seemed to level out through most of high school. I was pretty good at laying low. In college, I made lots of friends and things were different. No one made fun of me and people actually wanted to be my friend. I had several really close friends but life has taken us in different directions. Thankfully, having children has brought some of us closer together as we've bonded over sleepless nights and stretch marks. I had this one friend in particular that I thought would stick with me through it all. Out of nowhere she retracted her invitation for me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding and basically stopped talking to me altogether. It took me almost 4 years to get over that. It made me hesitant to grow close in new friendships. I have forgiven her but I'm not sure what I would do or how I would feel if she wanted to talk to me at this point in our lives. We had been inseperable for about 5 years and then it was gone. When something like that happens, you start to question everything about yourself. I felt so unworthy of friendship after that. She left a huge hole in my heart for a long time.
Then there was the job I had when we were newlyweds. I started this job right after our honeymoon. My coworkers were other seminary wives. They were so cruel. They wouldn't talk to me and loved having little inside jokes that they rubbed in my face. The joke was on them because I didn't really care; I was just happy to have a good job. Long story short, they led me to believe that the boss didn't like me and they manipulated me into believing I was a bad employee. One of them fired me. It was only after the fact that I learned the boss liked me and they had been lying. It hurt so bad because like me, their husbands were depending on their income as they studied for their degrees. I could not understand why they had done the opposite of what the Bible we all believed taught us to do. They gave no reason based upon job performance, just that I didn't "fit".
By far, the worst experience I had was with my last job in Atlanta. Only now, 2 1/2 years later, can I speak of it without my blood pressure going haywire. I worked hard and put up with a lot for 15 months to find that the boss' wife/acting office manager was searching for someone to replace me. Once again, I didn't "fit". Worst of all, the girl who worked most closely with me, another follower of Christ, was so rude to me and took the side of the business owners. I will even go so far as to say that she was whispering things in their ear that were not true. The boss' wife wrote in the unemployment report that I had stolen, lied, and a host of other negative things that were untrue. I was shocked. I still feel nervous that people in the same social circles think that I'm a bad person. I expect the type of people I worked for to do sleazy things like that, but the coworker who is supposed to be on my team really let me down. I know for a fact that I was an upstanding employee because when we had my unemployment hearing, my former boss was under oath and could not speak ill of me.
Mean people suck. I want to teach my girl to be kind, gentle, and clothed in righteousness. I also want her to know how to stand up for what's right, even if it can cost her. People are going to hurt her feelings, but I want her to be strong enough to move on and not let it get her down for long. Do you have any experiences to share or tips on raising a confident daughter?
Friday, May 18, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
What 6 Months Has Taught Me
After 6 months of mothering my little Kathryn Grace, I've learned a thing or two. I wanted to share those thoughts with you. You may already have kids and can relate, or maybe babies are just entering your thoughts. Perhaps you are waddling around wondering "WHEN is this child going to COME OUT?!" I can assure you, dear one, that not only is your baby is going to come out [I might add that he/she will not be born early but right on time] but that you are going to be just fine.
1. It doesn't matter how your baby gets here, as long as they arrive. Whether you're induced, use a doula, hpynobirth, water birth, have an epidural, schedule your c-section like a haircut or deliver 10 minutes after your water breaks in Wal-Mart, of all places----in the end all that matters is that your precious baby gets here safely. We all have different opinions [mine are certainly strong] but it's not my goal to make anyone feel bad for their birthing choices/situations. We're hard enough on ourselves as it is so I think we should all give each other a break.
2. You are the expert. No, you are not a parenting expert, but you are the expert on your child. You can read all the books, articles, and blogs that you want. You can certainly ask questions to your pediatrician. Just remember that no one knows your baby better than you do and ultimately, you need to make decisions regarding everything from what they wear to diapering, from sleep schedules to when to start solids. Be confident; God gave us everything we need to mother our children! I have found that when I take the advice of others [even the pediatrician] too seriously, it usually backfires. You will get weird unsolicited advice everywhere you go. Just smile and move on.
3. Beg, borrow, and steal. Ok, so don't steal and begging would be humiliating, but do borrow. Don't get caught up in having to have all new things. Most of what we have is borrowed and I'm thankful because a) baby things are expensive! and b) I can pass things along to others without feeling any sort of attachment to the item. Find a community of moms that you can barter with. You'll be able to give things to your baby that you might not have been able to afford and besides, it's always fun to give baby something 'new' to entertain them!
4. Make time for yourself. I hear this is important, but I'm still working on it. Something tells me that "me" time has to be more than getting groceries by myself or taking a 7 minute shower while my husband stands outside the curtain with the baby. It's also important to eat right and exercise so you can keep up with your active little one.
5. Believe it or not, you will have a hot meal again. The days of one of us having to hold Kathryn while we eat are not far from memory, and sometimes we still have to do it. It will get easier. In the mean time, buy some foil to keep your food hot.
6. Routines are important. Notice I didn't say "schedules" are important. Being a slave to the clock is just not practical for my personality or our lifestyle. It might be nice if Kathryn would sleep 7pm-7am but if she were in bed that early, she wouldn't get to see her daddy. We do, however, try to stick to a routine. Every day is different but for example, at night we do bath time a certain way, have family Bible time, and mellow out until she's ready to go to bed. Sleeping is quite the issue in our home, but we take a relaxed approach. There's no reason to get all stressed out about things your baby isn't ready for. From moving out of her swing to starting solids, Kathryn has let me know when she was ready.
7. Don't blink. Seriously, don't. One minute they're swaddled up like a baby burrito and the next minute they're sitting up and eating sweet potatoes.
1. It doesn't matter how your baby gets here, as long as they arrive. Whether you're induced, use a doula, hpynobirth, water birth, have an epidural, schedule your c-section like a haircut or deliver 10 minutes after your water breaks in Wal-Mart, of all places----in the end all that matters is that your precious baby gets here safely. We all have different opinions [mine are certainly strong] but it's not my goal to make anyone feel bad for their birthing choices/situations. We're hard enough on ourselves as it is so I think we should all give each other a break.
2. You are the expert. No, you are not a parenting expert, but you are the expert on your child. You can read all the books, articles, and blogs that you want. You can certainly ask questions to your pediatrician. Just remember that no one knows your baby better than you do and ultimately, you need to make decisions regarding everything from what they wear to diapering, from sleep schedules to when to start solids. Be confident; God gave us everything we need to mother our children! I have found that when I take the advice of others [even the pediatrician] too seriously, it usually backfires. You will get weird unsolicited advice everywhere you go. Just smile and move on.
3. Beg, borrow, and steal. Ok, so don't steal and begging would be humiliating, but do borrow. Don't get caught up in having to have all new things. Most of what we have is borrowed and I'm thankful because a) baby things are expensive! and b) I can pass things along to others without feeling any sort of attachment to the item. Find a community of moms that you can barter with. You'll be able to give things to your baby that you might not have been able to afford and besides, it's always fun to give baby something 'new' to entertain them!
4. Make time for yourself. I hear this is important, but I'm still working on it. Something tells me that "me" time has to be more than getting groceries by myself or taking a 7 minute shower while my husband stands outside the curtain with the baby. It's also important to eat right and exercise so you can keep up with your active little one.
5. Believe it or not, you will have a hot meal again. The days of one of us having to hold Kathryn while we eat are not far from memory, and sometimes we still have to do it. It will get easier. In the mean time, buy some foil to keep your food hot.
6. Routines are important. Notice I didn't say "schedules" are important. Being a slave to the clock is just not practical for my personality or our lifestyle. It might be nice if Kathryn would sleep 7pm-7am but if she were in bed that early, she wouldn't get to see her daddy. We do, however, try to stick to a routine. Every day is different but for example, at night we do bath time a certain way, have family Bible time, and mellow out until she's ready to go to bed. Sleeping is quite the issue in our home, but we take a relaxed approach. There's no reason to get all stressed out about things your baby isn't ready for. From moving out of her swing to starting solids, Kathryn has let me know when she was ready.
7. Don't blink. Seriously, don't. One minute they're swaddled up like a baby burrito and the next minute they're sitting up and eating sweet potatoes.
Monday, May 14, 2012
Six Months?!
How did a whole half of a year go by just....like that?!?!?!!!
How did she go from this...
At her 6 month appointment she was 14.13 lbs and 25 inches long. She's in the 10th percentile for height and between the 10th & 25th for weight. Her head is 16", which is in the 50th percentile. Of course it is. :)
Toes are a very big deal right now. If she can't lift her foot to her mouth, she just folds herself down to reach them. Whatever works! Her favorite song is still "The Wheels on the Bus" for some reason. We still struggle with riding in the car but I think the road trips we've taken in the last few weeks have helped a lot.
I'm trying to keep up with everything she's been learning and growing into but it's kind of hard because I just want to scream "SLOW DOWN!" But we love her so so much and our favorite thing is just watching her little personality really shine as she grows. We call her "independent at an arm's length." We are loving [and so is she!] that she can sit up. The world is so different now!
How did she go from this...
...to this?
Officially, she's 6 1/2 months. In the span of one week she learned to sit up totally unsupported and started babbling nonstop. She'll say "dadadadada" "bababababa" and "mamamamama". How'd she get so smart?
She is also now in her high chair and able to ride facing forward in her stroller. Too many changes for me to handle, but I don't have a choice do I?
Toes are a very big deal right now. If she can't lift her foot to her mouth, she just folds herself down to reach them. Whatever works! Her favorite song is still "The Wheels on the Bus" for some reason. We still struggle with riding in the car but I think the road trips we've taken in the last few weeks have helped a lot.
I'm trying to keep up with everything she's been learning and growing into but it's kind of hard because I just want to scream "SLOW DOWN!" But we love her so so much and our favorite thing is just watching her little personality really shine as she grows. We call her "independent at an arm's length." We are loving [and so is she!] that she can sit up. The world is so different now!
Monday, April 23, 2012
5 months old!
So even though Kathryn turns 6 months old this Friday, I still wanted to talk about her at 5 months. I'm keeping this as kind of a digital scrapbook of her life, month by month, because I can't imagine being able to actually scrapbook.
*At 5 months her weight was 14.7lbs. I tried to measure her and I think it was 27" but I'm not sure. She's wiggly.
*She officially started rolling over! She has be doing in before but now she's not afraid of it. It used to scare her, especially because she could roll back to tummy but couldn't figure out how to get back on her back. Being on her tummy is kind of scary to little ones.
*She is also handing out kisses to people other than mommy! She kisses her daddy and has done it to some friends and other family members on occasion.
*I want to remember most about 5 months how loud she is. She has zero regard for anyone else and I love it. Scream, blow raspberries, and keep lighting up the world with that smile baby girl!
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Four Months Old!
Today my little miss had her 4 month check up. She's actually 4 months and a few days but who's counting? If you are a friend of mind you know that we have struggled so much with breastfeeding. It literally took us 3 1/2 months to get it down pat. The past 2-3 weeks have been awesome! With each month I can also pat myself on the back for making it another month. So, if you are struggling with it yourself, know that you can do it! I've made it through the ringer and can say that it is totally worth it.
Ready for the stats? My big girl has gone from the 8th percentile to the 25th percentile since her 2 month appointment. She weighs 13lbs and 3.5 oz and is 24 inches long. So big!
She is actively exploring her surroundings at all times. She loves to look around and smile at others. She had a small stage during her third month in which she did not want anyone to hold her but me. She seems to be growing out of that. Mommy isn't sure how she feels about it though. ;)
She often plays independently, as long as she can still see me. She loves her playmat still [a great investment] and is learning to play in her entertainer. She also has a new best friend.
In the past month Kathryn has really been working hard on her communication skills. She went from blowing raspberries to grunting, and then out of nowhere started shrieking and hasn't looked back. She gets all worked up with her arms and legs and then lets out a loud, high-pitched squeal. Of course, we react with great joy so she continues to do it. It's so fun!
She is really good at grabbing and holding onto things. She can hold her toys and enjoys throwing them. It's fun to watch her reach out for Bailey or for my nose. She loves to get hold of my face with both her hands and give me a wet sloppy kiss.
She still absolutely hates riding in the car. Every once in a while when we are just in town she does ok, but she will cry all the way to Louisville/Lexington if she has to. Which makes going anywhere undesirable. My nerves can't handle it.
She sleeps pretty well at night. At 3 months we moved her out of her bassinet and into her pack and play, and she started waking up several times a night when we did that. She had previously slept all night but after the growth spurt she's had, now I know why! Sometimes she just wants to be patted back to sleep because she isn't quite able to put herself back to sleep when she wakes up. Napping is hit or miss. She sleeps great if she's being held but not so much when you put her down. That's ok with me because I just take a nap with her. A great time for her to nap is when I pack her up in her stroller and go for a long walk around the university.
Her favorite toy is her daddy. When he comes home she starts kicking those legs and waving her arms with excitement. Sometimes it's just one arm, and Justin calls it her "chicken wing". She looks at him with such expectation..."What's he going to do next?" She gets upset with him when he tries to sit still with her. We had our first instance of her getting upset when he left for work. It was short-lived but his absence was definitely the source of her distress.
What I want to remember most about this stage is how expressive she is. She is so aware of everything and I know that will keep us on our toes as she grows. She wakes up with such joy every morning. The only time she is ever upset is in the car. As I've been writing this post, she is just laying on her playmat kicking her legs and babbling/shrieking. So much fun!
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
You're Gonna Miss This
I'm sitting in a chair, currently unattached to my child. I think to myself, "I don't know how long this will last, so I should do something....." which leads me to another thought. I really don't know how long this will last, but it's going by so fast.
She is currently shrieking. That's her new mode of communication. She's in her "rocking entertainer" which is a thing that holds her up in a little seat that turns all the way around, and there are things to her to bang on. I take comfort in the fact that her feet don't reach the bottom of it [yet]. She is playing without having to have me right there. Miss Independent, she is.
She doesn't need me to hold her head up. I don't have to nurse her every hour, she sleeps most of the night [although a nice nap would be nice, too], and she is increasingly aware of her environment. Pretty soon she'll be rolling over, sitting up, and eating sweet potatoes.
I'm going to miss her clinging to me. I won't miss or even remember having dirty dishes and dusty corners, but I will miss all of the times I've had to stop doing household chores because she needed to be held.
I'm going to miss her lack of mobility when she crawls and then runs away from me. I'm going to miss the grunts, raspberries, and loud shrieks when she starts sounding our syllables and asking for a drink of water.
I'm going to miss spraying and washing her diapers on the day that we go pick out her first big girl panties. In the midst of the potty training struggles that will come, I hope I remember how much I really do love cloth diapering.
I'm going to miss her waking me up sometimes every two or three hours at night because she needs a little snack or just to feel my skin against hers. The tired eyes I see every morning in the mirror will always be there, but for different reasons.
Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow
for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow.
So settle down cobwebs, dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.
She is currently shrieking. That's her new mode of communication. She's in her "rocking entertainer" which is a thing that holds her up in a little seat that turns all the way around, and there are things to her to bang on. I take comfort in the fact that her feet don't reach the bottom of it [yet]. She is playing without having to have me right there. Miss Independent, she is.
She doesn't need me to hold her head up. I don't have to nurse her every hour, she sleeps most of the night [although a nice nap would be nice, too], and she is increasingly aware of her environment. Pretty soon she'll be rolling over, sitting up, and eating sweet potatoes.
I'm going to miss her clinging to me. I won't miss or even remember having dirty dishes and dusty corners, but I will miss all of the times I've had to stop doing household chores because she needed to be held.
I'm going to miss her lack of mobility when she crawls and then runs away from me. I'm going to miss the grunts, raspberries, and loud shrieks when she starts sounding our syllables and asking for a drink of water.
I'm going to miss spraying and washing her diapers on the day that we go pick out her first big girl panties. In the midst of the potty training struggles that will come, I hope I remember how much I really do love cloth diapering.
I'm going to miss her waking me up sometimes every two or three hours at night because she needs a little snack or just to feel my skin against hers. The tired eyes I see every morning in the mirror will always be there, but for different reasons.
Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow
for babies grow up, we've learned to our sorrow.
So settle down cobwebs, dust go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.
Monday, February 13, 2012
How I Met Your Father [Part 1]
I'd like to tell you the story of how I met, befriended, and then much later became the girlfriend [and of course, wife] of my husband. Not because it's Valentine's Day [tomorrow] but because yesterday was the five year anniversary of our accidental first date.
We met the semester of my junior year of college [his sophomore year]. The location of our meeting is much debated between the two of us, but I'm right. It was at the local laundromat on a Sunday afternoon. It was sunny but the air was still crisp from winter. No one else was there except for him and his then girlfriend. My husband claims that we met in the lobby of my dorm when a large group of us were going to the movies, but that was some time after our first meeting. When the group of us went to the movies several new friendships began for me. I began to spend a lot of time with this group of people and got to know Justin through this. I must admit, though, that I had my eye on someone else for a long time to come...
During my senior year of college, we began to spend a lot of time together. I guess you could say that I considered him my "best guy friend". He was still dating someone else and I certainly was not interested in him as anything more than a friend. Sure, the thought crossed my mind a few times that he and I were quite compatible and over time I even began to find him attractive. Not that my husband isn't adorable, I was just blind to it through our friendship. Looking back, I am thankful that God kept my eyes covered because it allowed me to have an open relationship without any walls, insecurities or fear of rejection.
It has been my experience in my own life as well as in the lives of the college girls that I get to minister to now that it is easy exclaim, even in private, "Where is my husband?!" As a naive Christian girl, I thought I found my husband every other month. It's normal. But I had sincerely prayed about this situation and I knew that God had someone for me, and that it would be a man that I had been friends with. I prayed about it often and as a p.s., "Lord, could he please be a baseball player?" I felt that God would take a beautiful friendship and in His time, turn it into something more. How silly that I was in the midst of that for a couple of years with Justin without even realizing it!
A year after we met, I graduated college and Justin and I parted ways for the summer. He was going to China and I was beginning a job in the same town we attended school. When we were apart that summer, I had begun to realize that I indeed did have some feelings for him. I had finally realized that the other guy that I was interested in for so long was just not interested in me. So I put my best face on and decided to move forward, unattached. I moved into a house with some other girls, got a dog, and entered the working world. Justin went to China and when he came to my house with some other friends for the first time after the summer, I couldn't understand why I wanted to hug him. I had missed him.
Justin and all of his buddies would come over on the weekends to watch movies and more importantly, eat. This time in my life is where I got to fully embrace the gift of hospitality that I did not know I possessed. I loved spending my paycheck [somewhat unwisely!] on feeding those boys. Justin would often come over early to help me "test" food or just hang out. When his birthday came along that December, he came to my house that Saturday for breakfast. I distinctly remember carrying his plate of pancakes from the kitchen to where he was sitting on the couch and thinking, "I could do this for the rest of my life." It was then that I realized that I couldn't suppress my attraction for him any longer. I hoped it would go away.
A few days later my roommate and I threw an epic Christmas party and then it was time for Justin to head home for the Christmas break. Over the holidays, he took me to my first UK game at Rupp Arena. Being a Tennessee fan, this didn't interest me at all but he did so I went. After he came back for his last semester of college, he and I made a friendly wager over the UK/UT basketball game. Whomever's team lost had to take the other person out to dinner. It never entered my mind to think of it as a date, and I'm not sure if it occurred to him either.
It was a snowy Sunday, and I wanted to back out because the last thing I had wanted at that point was to ruin a great friendship because of my silly feelings. I remember that I wore my Timberland boots [hey, it was 2006 and snowing], jeans, a white shirt, and a pink zip up hoodie. We went to Lexington and he took me to Cheddar's because he had lost our bet. We also shopped a little and went to the Starbucks that we had frequented in our friendship. We then attended 608 at Southland Christian Church, a Sunday night service geared toward college students. The speaker was talking about seizing opportunities placed before you and actually said that if there's a girl in your life that you've been thinking about, just ask her out. He and I just looked at each other out of the corner of our eye and didn't talk the rest of the night. It was a long drive back to my house after.
When he pulled in my driveway, I started to ask him if he thought that perhaps the reason we had been friends to easily and for so long was that we were meant for something more. But I couldn't get the words out before he said, "Yes!" He knew what I was going to say. I think he wanted to say it but was too shy. We talked about things over the next few days and we decided that we should begin a cautious relationship.
I had known for a long time that if he would just admit that he was interested in pursuing me, we'd get married. But that's a story for another day...
I'd like to encourage my college girls that if you seek the Lord's will in your future mate, praying about it often, He will give you the desires of your heart. Don't believe me? Justin played baseball. ;)
We met the semester of my junior year of college [his sophomore year]. The location of our meeting is much debated between the two of us, but I'm right. It was at the local laundromat on a Sunday afternoon. It was sunny but the air was still crisp from winter. No one else was there except for him and his then girlfriend. My husband claims that we met in the lobby of my dorm when a large group of us were going to the movies, but that was some time after our first meeting. When the group of us went to the movies several new friendships began for me. I began to spend a lot of time with this group of people and got to know Justin through this. I must admit, though, that I had my eye on someone else for a long time to come...
During my senior year of college, we began to spend a lot of time together. I guess you could say that I considered him my "best guy friend". He was still dating someone else and I certainly was not interested in him as anything more than a friend. Sure, the thought crossed my mind a few times that he and I were quite compatible and over time I even began to find him attractive. Not that my husband isn't adorable, I was just blind to it through our friendship. Looking back, I am thankful that God kept my eyes covered because it allowed me to have an open relationship without any walls, insecurities or fear of rejection.
It has been my experience in my own life as well as in the lives of the college girls that I get to minister to now that it is easy exclaim, even in private, "Where is my husband?!" As a naive Christian girl, I thought I found my husband every other month. It's normal. But I had sincerely prayed about this situation and I knew that God had someone for me, and that it would be a man that I had been friends with. I prayed about it often and as a p.s., "Lord, could he please be a baseball player?" I felt that God would take a beautiful friendship and in His time, turn it into something more. How silly that I was in the midst of that for a couple of years with Justin without even realizing it!
A year after we met, I graduated college and Justin and I parted ways for the summer. He was going to China and I was beginning a job in the same town we attended school. When we were apart that summer, I had begun to realize that I indeed did have some feelings for him. I had finally realized that the other guy that I was interested in for so long was just not interested in me. So I put my best face on and decided to move forward, unattached. I moved into a house with some other girls, got a dog, and entered the working world. Justin went to China and when he came to my house with some other friends for the first time after the summer, I couldn't understand why I wanted to hug him. I had missed him.
Justin and all of his buddies would come over on the weekends to watch movies and more importantly, eat. This time in my life is where I got to fully embrace the gift of hospitality that I did not know I possessed. I loved spending my paycheck [somewhat unwisely!] on feeding those boys. Justin would often come over early to help me "test" food or just hang out. When his birthday came along that December, he came to my house that Saturday for breakfast. I distinctly remember carrying his plate of pancakes from the kitchen to where he was sitting on the couch and thinking, "I could do this for the rest of my life." It was then that I realized that I couldn't suppress my attraction for him any longer. I hoped it would go away.
A few days later my roommate and I threw an epic Christmas party and then it was time for Justin to head home for the Christmas break. Over the holidays, he took me to my first UK game at Rupp Arena. Being a Tennessee fan, this didn't interest me at all but he did so I went. After he came back for his last semester of college, he and I made a friendly wager over the UK/UT basketball game. Whomever's team lost had to take the other person out to dinner. It never entered my mind to think of it as a date, and I'm not sure if it occurred to him either.
It was a snowy Sunday, and I wanted to back out because the last thing I had wanted at that point was to ruin a great friendship because of my silly feelings. I remember that I wore my Timberland boots [hey, it was 2006 and snowing], jeans, a white shirt, and a pink zip up hoodie. We went to Lexington and he took me to Cheddar's because he had lost our bet. We also shopped a little and went to the Starbucks that we had frequented in our friendship. We then attended 608 at Southland Christian Church, a Sunday night service geared toward college students. The speaker was talking about seizing opportunities placed before you and actually said that if there's a girl in your life that you've been thinking about, just ask her out. He and I just looked at each other out of the corner of our eye and didn't talk the rest of the night. It was a long drive back to my house after.
When he pulled in my driveway, I started to ask him if he thought that perhaps the reason we had been friends to easily and for so long was that we were meant for something more. But I couldn't get the words out before he said, "Yes!" He knew what I was going to say. I think he wanted to say it but was too shy. We talked about things over the next few days and we decided that we should begin a cautious relationship.
I had known for a long time that if he would just admit that he was interested in pursuing me, we'd get married. But that's a story for another day...
I'd like to encourage my college girls that if you seek the Lord's will in your future mate, praying about it often, He will give you the desires of your heart. Don't believe me? Justin played baseball. ;)
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